OpinionsEye OpenerGratitude and adversity: Face to face

Gratitude and adversity: Face to face

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When life is sweet, say thank you and celebrate, when life is bitter, say thank you and grow. — Unknown author

I’d like to write about gratitude and appreciation. First, allow me to share with you a feedback from Land Bank AVP Jocelyn Amodia to my previous column here:

It is with great concern we read your article published in the MetroPost expressing disappointment for waiting so long to finish the encashment of check of your wife last March 9. We would like to apologize for your inconvenience.

We try our best to process over-the-counter transactions the fastest time possible. It is with deep regret that on the day your wife transacted with us, we encountered intermittent offline status for almost an hour which caused the delay. Add to that, the non-regular transactions of our government clients came unexpectedly on the same day which increased our volume substantially.

We assure you that the bank is taking steps to improve our services. Pag-Ibig Fund releases have been done through Cash Card which you can withdraw in any ATM. The use of the check is the choice of the agency for particular transaction. On the implementation of the Senior Citizen Law, we thank you for bringing this matter to our attention. The signages might not have been noticed, so a bigger and visible standee is now in place, and seats for Special Lane have been properly labelled.

We value our customers and we look forward delivering you a better service experience in the future.

Through this column where I had earlier expressed my disappointment, I want to say “thank you” to Land Bank Dumaguete for sparing some time in finding ways to improve their situation in their office. Hopefully, others who had the same problems as I did will also get feedback to their complains. Especially for a government bank, people are expecting it to provide topnotch performance. I hope they will be true to their intention of enhancing the bank’s services. To Land Bank, my sincerest gratitude.

Gratitude in times of Covid-19?

Gratitude is easy if one has food in the refrigerator or the pantry, or when he receives a big check, or a special gift, or everyone in the family is healthy.

But can one also give thanks when he is made to stay home and not being assured what could happen next? Or one’s relatives no longer have anything for their next meal? Would one be able to still say thank you if he reads about the mounting pandemic deaths in the news? Or about the intensifying fear in people’s hearts?

In good times, gratitude makes our best days brighter. In bad times, gratitude actually helps us get through with life. It is not a luxury. It is a coping strategy. And it works.

I am not saying that gratitude will come more easily or naturally during a calamity. While it is easy to feel grateful for the good things, nobody “feels” grateful that he has lost a job, or a home, or good health, or that a family member has been diagnosed with CoViD-19 and is dying.

Nonetheless, it is necessary to make a distinction between feeling grateful and being grateful.

Generally, we don’t have absolute control over our emotions. We cannot effortlessly dictate ourselves to feel glad, less miserable, or joyful.

That is because feelings follow from the way we see the world: the thoughts we have about the way things are done, what we think the way things should be, and the distance between these two points.

Being grateful is a choice, a dominant outlook that endures, and is comparatively resistant to the gains and losses that flow in and out of our lives. When tragedy strikes, gratitude provides a standpoint from which we can view life in its wholeness, and not be dazed by the effects of fleeting conditions.

There are four reasons why we need to be thankful even in the midst of misfortune and harsh conditions:

We are being taught. Let’s face it, we learn more from want turns out wrong than from what goes right. If this CoViD-19 didn’t happen to us, people would have continued in their usual merry ways of frantically making money, going through great lengths to achieve their ambitions, neglecting they have family at home waiting for their love and presence, or forgetting that there is a God to whom we all need to pray and worship. With the negative impacts of CoViD-19 hanging over us, people suddenly are realizing that money is not everything, titles and positions lose their significance, attention and focus on the family and what they eat have become more important, and that only God has the cure for this pandemic.

We are provided a mirror of our lives.
In times of adversity, we demonstrate who we truly are, without the trimmings which may have been developed through the years because of pride and self-love. In times of need, we show if we are truly generous or simply being avaricious. Through our actions, we reveal if we really have courage to stick our necks to help others or are just glorified cowards.

We are given another chance to build character. People who are thought to be unshakeable are actually those who are shaken the most or traumatized many times over. Due to the disasters they may have gone through, they have learned what their true priorities are, what they trust, where their faith is, and what they hope in. They are simply grateful.

We are being prepared for something better.
As we exercise problem-solving skills, and learn what to avoid next, going through adversity conditions us to be prepared for the worst. Tough times normally come unannounced, and understanding how we got through the previous time prepares us to face the next big one.

Takeaways

Developing and nurturing everyday gratitude is not a quick fix. It takes time and patience, but it enables us to take a step back, and view life from its entirety, rather than becoming stuck in the clatter and confusion that can so simply overpower, if not totally devastate us, during moments of adversity.

Eventually, our reward is an outlook that it is relatively immune to the slumps of life’s rollercoaster ride.

When asked if my cup is half-full or half-empty, my only response is that I am thankful I have a cup
. — Unkwown author

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Author’s email: [email protected]

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