Happy 2025, everyone!
Or, as I like to think of it, the time of year when we collectively embark on a noble quest to reinvent ourselves—only to discover that most of us will, inevitably, revert to our old ways within a few short weeks.
Yes, I’m talking about New Year’s resolutions—the ambitious promises we make to improve ourselves, only for those promises to gather dust right next to last year’s holiday decorations.
But here’s a thought — What if, instead of setting ourselves up for potential failure with unrealistic, rigid resolutions, we take a more relaxed, forgiving approach? What if, instead of making hard-and-fast “resolutions,” we focus on setting “intentions”?
At first glance, the difference might seem minor. However, it’s both subtle and significant. A resolution, by definition, is a firm, often non-negotiable commitment. It’s a bold declaration to rid ourselves of perceived flaws and shortcomings—something akin to declaring war on ourselves. The problem with this? It’s an all-or-nothing approach, one that leads to disappointment and discouragement when we inevitably slip up.
Consider the classic New Year’s resolutions: “I will run a marathon!” “I will learn French!” “I will finally conquer my irrational fear of spiders!” These goals are admirable, but they also come with a heavy burden of expectation. You’ve drawn a line in the sand, and if you cross it, the consequences can feel like failure.
Now, let’s look at intentions. These are not hard-edged, all-encompassing commitments, but more of a soft, flexible nudge in a particular direction. Think of intentions as guiding hopes, gentle reminders to steer us toward positive change. An intention allows room for mistakes and detours—it’s about progress, not perfection.
For example, instead of saying, “I will run a marathon,” an intention might be, “I will try to exercise more.” Rather than demanding fluency in French by December 31st, the intention could be, “I will explore learning French at my own pace.” Instead of a rigid “I will conquer my fear of spiders,” an intention might look like, “I will consider the possibility of understanding spiders better… from a safe distance.”
The beauty of intentions is in their inherent flexibility and self-compassion. Life rarely goes according to plan—unexpected challenges, obligations, and distractions inevitably arise. You might miss a marathon you had your eye on, forget to study your French flashcards, or even discover that spiders, while still creepy, are fascinating little creatures.
The difference is that with resolutions, these “failures” feel like personal shortcomings. With intentions, setbacks are simply part of the journey, and it’s okay to recalibrate along the way.
Think of it this way — resolutions are like trying to jam a square peg into a round hole. You might force it in eventually, but the process is painful, and the outcome is probably less than perfect. On the other hand, intentions are like finding the right tool for the job. It may take some trial and error to figure out what works best for you, but the experience is far less stressful, and the result is much more likely to be satisfying and sustainable.
So, in 2025, let’s leave behind the suffocating pressure of rigid resolutions and embrace the more inviting warmth of intentions. Let’s focus on progress, however small, rather than chasing after unattainable perfection. Let’s celebrate each step forward, learn from our setbacks, and show ourselves the same kindness we often reserve for others. After all, we deserve it.
And who knows? Maybe, just maybe, we’ll end up achieving some of the goals we set out for ourselves. But even if we don’t, we’ll have done it with a sense of humor and a smile on our face—and that, in itself, is a victory worth celebrating.
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